Ayahuasca Retreat & Arkana Spiritual Center
Chapter 1: Searching for Healing Beyond the Known
Dear Friend,
Five years ago, I didn’t go looking for ayahuasca for myself. I went searching for help for my ex-partner, a military veteran drowning in PTSD. His days were filled with nightmares, rage, numbness, and isolation. We tried everything Western medicine offered: therapy, medication, coping tools. Nothing touched the root. I watched the man I loved sink deeper and deeper into the darkness. I watched him teeter on the brink, suicidal thoughts, self-harm attempts, nights where I wasn’t sure he’d wake up in the morning. And in my desperation to save him, I started to disappear too. I tried to be his anchor, his therapist, his savior, his everything. But trauma that deep doesn’t get fixed by another person holding it all.
There were nights when, after trying to keep him safe, I’d end up alone, staring at the ceiling, feeling like I was breaking apart. My own thoughts began to spiral. I flirted with self-harm more than once. I thought: If I can’t save him, if I can’t fix this, what’s the point? I know now that those were some of my darkest hours. Eventually, I left. It wasn’t a dramatic exit, just a slow realization that if I didn’t go, I might not survive. But leaving him didn’t end the darkness. It just left me alone with mine.
And yet, in hindsight, I can see what was happening: Mother Ayahuasca was waiting for me. She had been whispering to me for years, through articles I stumbled across, random conversations, synchronicities that felt like more than coincidences. She was waiting for me to answer the call.
When I finally did, it wasn’t for him anymore. It was for me.
Looking back now, I see the patterns so clearly. My compulsion to save, to rescue, to heal everyone else at the cost of myself. My identity as a therapist only amplified that impulse. I thought it was my duty. But what I didn’t understand yet was that real healing starts with yourself. That’s the gift Ayahuasca gives you, even when you don’t know you’re asking for it. She makes you face the ways you’ve abandoned yourself in the name of saving others. She doesn’t let you hide behind your roles or your good intentions.
When I finally booked my retreat at Arkana, I still thought it was about trauma and healing, but I was secretly hoping it would numb my pain. Instead, Mother Ayahuasca tore down the walls I had built to keep myself from feeling. At first, Arkana told me the retreat was full. I cried. I prayed. I surrendered. The next day, a spot opened. Three days later, I was on a plane to Peru, terrified but trusting.
That trip didn’t just save my life. It woke me up to who I really am.
Chapter Two: The Sacred Valley — My First Retreat
Flying into Cusco, the air feels thin but electric. The Andes stretch endlessly, snow-capped peaks rising above clouds. The Sacred Valley is nestled right in the heart of this ancient land, a place that has held ceremony, prayer, and healing for thousands of years. The drive from the city wound down into the valley, and with every mile, I felt like I was traveling backward in time. Cobblestone streets, terraced fields, Quechua women in bright woven skirts carrying baskets. The mountains pressed close on all sides, like guardians. The energy was palpable.
When I arrived at Arkana’s Sacred Valley center, I felt both safe and terrified. It was intimate, only a handful of us in the group. Two Shipibo shamans, six facilitators, and maybe ten participants. The ratio was nearly one-to-one, which meant there was no hiding. Every tear, every purge, every crack in your soul was seen and supported. The maloca, the ceremonial hut, was simple but powerful, round, mats arranged in a certain way. Each of us had a bucket, a blanket, and a little pillow. It looked ordinary, but I knew by the end of the night, it would become holy ground.
Ceremony One: Cutting Ties and Finding Myself
I went in with my list of intentions: clarity, direction, peace. Mother Ayahuasca laughed. It felt like she literally ripped the list from my hands and said: No. Not yet. You need to focus on yourself first.
And then it began.
For ten years, I had been tethered to a narcissistic relationship that haunted me long after it ended. His voice lived in my head. His grip lived in my body. Every time I thought I was free, another memory, another wound pulled me back. I had CPTSD through the years of abuse and mistreatment and attempts on my life. That night, Ayahuasca sliced through every tether. I felt him leaving me, his words, his control, his shadow. It was like chains falling off. My body shook, my stomach purged, and then I felt light. Empty. Free.
But she didn’t just cut him away. She held up a mirror and forced me to see where I had allowed him to stay. Where I had abandoned myself. Where I had mistaken toxicity for love. Where I choose to allow the taking of my energy and life force, and I couldnt’ run. I had played an active party in harming myself and it was a tough realization to see. Ayahuasca doesn’t give you what you want. She gives you what you need. That night, she gave me myself. She whispered: You are lovable. You are not broken. You are not an outcast. You are a healer. You’ve just been misunderstood.
I walked out of that maloca lighter than I had ever felt in my life.
Ceremony Two: The Dark Night of the Soul
The second night nearly broke me. Shamans call it the dark night of the soul, and I learned why. It was as though every fear I had ever carried came at me all at once. Death. Abandonment. Failure. Loneliness. Every shadow I had shoved down inside me came alive and surrounded me. I shook. I cried. I thought I couldn’t survive it.
But then, just as suddenly as it came, it passed. The fears dissolved like smoke in the night air. And I realized: I had faced it all, and I was still here. Something profound shifted in me. The fear was gone. For the first time in my life, I wasn’t afraid.
The very next morning, without hesitation, I booked a one-way ticket to London. I didn’t know why, only that I had to go. Ayahuasca had cleared the fear, and with it came clarity: the next chapter of my life was waiting across the ocean. I just knew that was where my next chapter lived and Mother Ayahuasca said Trust My Child.
Ceremony Three: Learning Unconditional Love
The third ceremony was softer, but no less powerful. It was about love, the kind I had never known. I realized I had never truly experienced unconditional love. Every relationship in my life had been marked by conditions: If you behave. If you succeed. If you sacrifice. If you change. Ayahuasca made me relive my childhood, watching my family dynamics like a movie playing out before me. I saw my little girl self: desperate for approval, desperate for love, trying to earn what should have been freely given.
And then, something miraculous happened. It was like she began sewing me back together. Threading love into the places that had been torn. Rebuilding me from the inside out. I felt whole in a way I had never felt before. She wrapped me in her arms and she said do you feel this child… this is love. This is what you must feel to give. When the icaros ended and the lights came up, I was sobbing. Not from pain, but from the overwhelming sense that, for the first time in my life, I was loved. Simply because I existed.
The Sacred Valley became my womb of rebirth. The ceremonies stripped me bare, but they also gave me back my life.
And when I left Peru, I didn’t just leave with healing I left with a new compass. I had no idea where it would take me, but I knew one thing for sure: I could never go back to who I was before.
Chapter Three: Integration — The Real Ceremony
When I left the Sacred Valley, I thought the hardest work was behind me. I had faced my demons, cut ties with the past, and finally felt love for myself. What I didn’t realize was that the real ceremony had just begun. Ayahuasca opened the door, but integration was the journey through it. The question became: How do I live this new truth in the world?
London — Learning to Trust the Unknown
I landed in London with nothing but four suitcases and a fire in my chest. No plan. No safety net. Just a deep knowing that this was where I needed to be. The city was alive with possibility. Cobblestone streets, markets bursting with colors, people from every culture rushing past. And yet, in the middle of all that noise, I felt a stillness. For the first time, I wasn’t running from fear, I was following intuition. I learned to trust the unknown, to walk into rooms without needing to control the outcome. Every new friend, every opportunity, felt like a breadcrumb leading me forward. I learned to be okay alone and taking my self our for dinners or just walking the streets. For the first time in my life I felt alive.
Greece — The Island of Reflection
From London, I went to Greece. The islands felt like ancient mirrors, whitewashed houses glowing in the sun, the ocean stretching endlessly blue. There, I learned the art of stillness. Sitting on cliffs at sunset, I could feel the medicine working through me still. Ayahuasca had shown me patterns; Greece gave me the silence to reflect on them. It was here I wrote endlessly in my journal, page after page of realizations about love, trust, boundaries, and the old versions of me that I was finally ready to release.
Paris — Remembering Beauty
Paris was a different medicine altogether. The city was alive with art, music, and romance. Walking along the Seine at night, I remembered beauty, not the kind tied to perfection, but the kind that awakens the soul. For so long, I had carried heaviness. Paris reminded me of lightness, of joy. That healing wasn’t always about pain, it was also about remembering how to laugh, how to dance, how to taste life fully again.
South Africa — Strength and Resilience
South Africa cracked me open in a different way. The land was raw, powerful, untamed. Lions roared in the distance, waves crashed against rugged coastlines. It was almost like I awoken my primal insticts. There, I felt my own strength. The ceremonies had made me softer, but South Africa reminded me that softness and strength could live together. That my healing didn’t make me fragile, it made me resilient. I stood on a mountain overlooking Cape Town and realized: I wasn’t the same woman who had once begged a man to love her, or who had stayed in rooms that crushed her spirit. I was standing taller, finally.
Belgium — Integration in the Everyday
Belgium was where the integration deepened. It wasn’t exotic or overwhelming. It was quiet, steady, ordinary. And that was the lesson: healing isn’t just about ceremonies or dramatic breakthroughs. It’s about the everyday. Cooking a meal. Laughing with strangers. Waking up and choosing peace. Integration was teaching me to bring the sacred into the ordinary. To live in a way where every day felt like ceremony.
Ayahuasca had been the spark, but integration was the flame. It was in London, Greece, Paris, South Africa, and Belgium that I learned the medicine doesn’t end when the maloca lights turn on. The real ceremony is life itself. And the question is always the same: Can you embody what you’ve learned? Can you live it when no one is watching?
And slowly, I was learning to say yes.
Chapter Four: Protector of the Medicine
After my first retreat five years ago, I felt a profound calling, not just to heal myself, but to protect the integrity of the medicine that had changed my life. There were shamans locally claiming to give ayahuasca, but the experience was often unsafe, misused, or lacking in authenticity. My mother, inspired by my transformation, was interested in exploring the medicine herself. During one ceremony, I immediately sensed that Mother Ayahuasca was showing me the importance of standing up for those who did not know what they were experiencing. When I called out the bad practices and misuse, I was met with resistance, even attack, from others in the room. That moment solidified a truth I’ve carried ever since: if I wanted others to experience this medicine safely and authentically, I would need to create education, structure, and a safe pathway.
That’s when I connected with Jose, the founder of Arkana Spiritual Center. I was honored that he allowed me to co-facilitate retreats alongside them, ensuring that participants could experience the medicine safely, ethically, and with proper support. Arkana is not just a retreat center, it is a sanctuary and here is why.
Why Arkana Stands Apart
Arkana has earned its reputation as the number one ayahuasca retreat in the world for good reason. Every aspect of the retreat is meticulously planned, with the owner and team thinking four to five layers deep into the process of transformation. From the moment a participant steps through the doors, every detail, from meals and accommodations to ceremony preparation and integration, is designed with intention. Nothing is left to chance.
Sacred Space & Authenticity: Arkana works directly with the original Shipibo lineage, including Maestra Justina, the head shaman, who continues to lead ceremonies with profound wisdom and integrity. All food, medicines, and practices are ethically sourced, honoring the culture, the lineage, and the medicine itself.
Multi-Layered Process: Each retreat is structured to guide participants through a series of intentional stages, opening, cleansing, connecting with the medicine, and integration. Every step is designed to ensure safety and meaningful transformation.
Guided Support: With a combination of shamans, facilitators, and therapist-guided integration (including myself), every participant is supported before, during, and after the retreat. This creates an environment where people feel safe to surrender, explore, and release.
Community and Protection: Arkana’s team acts as guardians of the medicine. The retreat space protects participants from harm, misguidance, or misusage of the sacred plants, ensuring that everyone’s experience is authentic, supported, and transformational.
My Role as a Co-Facilitator
Having experienced the medicine myself, I understand what it means to be vulnerable, to confront deep shadow work, and to emerge transformed. My role alongside Arkana is to provide guidance, emotional support, and integration coaching. I help participants navigate the profound shifts that occur during ceremony, ensuring that every person walks through the doors with trust, safety, and the intention to heal.
Why Protecting the Medicine Matters
The medicine is powerful, sacred, and transformative, but it is also vulnerable to misuse. My work as a protector of the medicine is about integrity, ethics, and love. It is about creating a safe, supportive, and structured path for others so that they, too, can experience the life-changing power of Mother Ayahuasca without harm, distraction, or misguidance. Being at Arkana is more than attending a retreat, it is joining a lineage of care, respect, and intentional transformation. Every detail is intentional because every life matters, and every participant deserves to experience the medicine as it was meant to be given.
Chapter Five: Reclaim Your Light — The 2025 Retreat
Returning to Arkana in 2025 felt like coming home, but this time, the home was transformed, as was I. I arrived with my mother, my significant other Chris, and 20 participants ready to reclaim their light. Unlike my first retreat, this experience took place in the Amazon jungle before transitioning to the Sacred Valley. The air was thick with humidity and life. Birds called through the treetops. Insects hummed in harmony with the river flowing nearby. The jungle itself seemed alive, protective, sacred.
Seven shamans guided us through ceremonies, including Maestra Justina, (With more than 40 years of experience, Maestra Justina stands as one of the most gifted healers of our generation. A direct descendant of a long lineage of Merayas, the Shipibo’s highest-ranking shamans, she is the living heir to their ancestral wisdom, carrying their sacred traditions with pride and integrity. Born in the small, riverside community of Vencedor on the banks of the Pisqui River in the upper Ucayali, she has devoted her life to preserving and sharing the medicine and teachings of her lineage). Her presence is more than guidance; it is medicine. Sitting in ceremony with her is like sitting with the living heartbeat of the Shipibo lineage. Even without speaking the same language, her energy communicates profound wisdom, love, and authority.
Ceremony One: Gratitude and Full Circle
The first ceremony was an emotional homecoming. Mother Ayahuasca welcomed me back and whispered through the medicine: Thank you for listening. Thank you for protecting. Thank you for guiding with integrity and love. I cried for five hours, feeling the weight of my journey from my first retreat to now. It was a ceremony of gratitude, reflection, and full-circle acknowledgment of my work in holding space and protecting the medicine. Our guests experienced profound breakthroughs as well. One participant who had been carrying guilt from a childhood trauma reported that, during the ceremony, she was able to forgive herself fully for the first time. Another participant, struggling with anxiety, described a deep sense of peace as if the medicine was gently cradling his fear and dissolving it completely.
Ceremony Two: Releasing Burdens
The second ceremony was more intense. For me, it felt as though the collective emotional weight of all my clients and participants passed through me. I purged physically and energetically, hearing the whisper: My child, that burden is mine to hold, not yours. Our guests experienced transformative releases as well. One woman, who had been trapped in patterns of self-sabotage in relationships, purged and described seeing the energetic cords she had been holding onto and cutting them. A man who had struggled with grief for years felt an old, suppressed sadness rise and leave in waves, finally allowing him to grieve fully without fear. By the end of the night, the room was filled with lightness, relief, and a shared sense of liberation.
Ceremony Three: Deep Connection and Insight
The third ceremony was one of the most profound experiences of the retreat. Maestra Justina placed her hand on my head, and I felt a shift that words cannot capture. It was as if her touch opened new neural pathways, giving me clarity, insight, and the deep understanding that I am her, and she is me. Guests also experienced life-changing insights. A participant with recurring patterns of distrust in relationships reported that she could finally feel unconditional love, not only from others but within herself. Another participant, facing long-standing family conflicts, described visions that allowed him to see his parents’ and siblings’ perspectives, creating empathy and understanding he hadn’t been able to access before.
Ceremony Four: Rest, Integration, and Presence
The fourth ceremony was softer but no less profound. It allowed for deep rest, reflection, and integration. Often, the most powerful work happens in stillness, and this ceremony reminded everyone to honor rest as a sacred part of the healing process. Guests reported subtle but life-changing shifts. One woman who had felt chronically exhausted and disconnected from her body felt an ease in her muscles and a grounded connection she hadn’t felt in years. A man who had struggled with perfectionism reported feeling more self-acceptance and a willingness to slow down, trusting that he doesn’t always have to “do” to be worthy.
Witnessing Transformation
While my own experiences were transformative, witnessing the participants’ breakthroughs was awe-inspiring. My mother experienced healing of long-standing family wounds. Chris experienced deep release, clarity, and alignment with his purpose. Others let go of trauma, reconnected to love, released fear, and reclaimed joy. This retreat underscored a truth I have always believed: transformation is not just about the medicine, it is about intention, guidance, integration, and community. The sacred container at Arkana, the ethical practices, and the presence of experienced shamans combined with trauma-informed therapist support allowed participants to fully trust the process, dive deep, and emerge changed.
Why Therapist Guidance Matters
Having a therapist or trained guide throughout this process is invaluable:
Trauma can surface unpredictably; without guidance, it can feel overwhelming.
Integration tools help translate spiritual insight into meaningful, everyday change.
Ethical, trauma-informed support ensures participants confront difficult memories safely.
Pre- and post-retreat preparation, workbooks, and integration circles give participants confidence and security.
At Arkana, the co-facilitation between shamans, facilitators, and therapists ensures that medicine is experienced safely, ethically, and with support, allowing transformation to unfold fully.
The Power of the Amazon and the Lineage
This retreat reinforced why Arkana is unique. Seven shamans, ethically sourced farm to table food and medicine, and adherence to Shipibo traditions, with Maestra Justina at the helm, creates a sacred container unlike any other. Every plant bath, excursion, and ceremony is intentional and reverent. Not only do we experience the medicine but we are educated through lessons, classes, and immersive expereinces that allow guests to not only feel Mother Ayahuasca but to feel like they have arrived into a family for live. Ayahuasca is not a recreational experience. Every journey is different, as each participant carries unique layers of experience, trauma, and growth. Science supports its power: studies show that ayahuasca can reduce depression, anxiety, and PTSD, promote neuroplasticity, and strengthen emotional resilience. When combined with ethical facilitation, guidance, and integration, it becomes transformative.
Chapter Six: The Science and Research Behind Ayahuasca
For many, ayahuasca is shrouded in mystery. Popular culture often frames it as a psychedelic adventure, a “trip,” or even a gimmick. But anyone who has sat in a maloca, felt the medicine’s energy, and witnessed real transformation knows it is far more than that. Ayahuasca is a sacred plant medicine with a centuries-old history among the indigenous peoples of the Amazon, particularly the Shipibo-Conibo of Peru. It contains DMT (dimethyltryptamine), a naturally occurring compound, and MAOIs (monoamine oxidase inhibitors) that allow DMT to activate in the body. But the chemical explanation, while fascinating, only scratches the surface. The true magic of ayahuasca lies in the mind-body-spirit integration it facilitates.
Neurobiology and Emotional Healing
Scientific studies have begun to illuminate what shamans and participants have long experienced firsthand. Research shows that ayahuasca can:
Reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety: A 2015 study in Psychopharmacology found that participants reported significant reductions in depressive symptoms even weeks after a single ceremony.
Promote neuroplasticity: Ayahuasca encourages the growth of new neural connections, giving the brain flexibility to break old patterns and form healthier responses to stress and trauma.
Enhance emotional processing: Functional MRI studies suggest that ayahuasca affects the amygdala, the brain’s center for fear and emotional memory, helping participants process previously suppressed or traumatic experiences.
In simpler terms: ayahuasca doesn’t just bring memories or emotions to the surface; it rewires the brain’s capacity to respond to them in a healthier, more integrated way.
Trauma-Specific Healing
As a therapist, I’ve seen clients struggle with PTSD, anxiety, and chronic emotional pain for years, sometimes decades. Traditional therapy is powerful, but trauma can be stubborn, lodged deep in the nervous system and often inaccessible through talk therapy alone. Ayahuasca works differently. By combining physical purging, emotional release, and heightened awareness, it allows people to access parts of their psyche that are otherwise unreachable. Studies published in Frontiers in Pharmacology and Journal of Psychoactive Drugs indicate that ayahuasca can significantly reduce PTSD symptoms, often in participants who have not responded fully to other interventions.
For example, in our Reclaim Your Light 2025 retreat, several participants had histories of unresolved trauma:
One woman, carrying years of emotional neglect, reported that ayahuasca allowed her to see herself through a lens of unconditional love, something she had never experienced before.
A man struggling with grief for a parent described visions that helped him integrate unresolved feelings, leading to a deep emotional release that felt both safe and permanent.
These are not isolated experiences, they reflect what research increasingly confirms: the medicine is effective for trauma when used in a supportive, guided, and intentional environment.
Why Integration and Guidance Matter
The science also supports what shamans and therapists know experientially: context and support are critical. Ayahuasca alone is powerful, but without ethical facilitation, a safe container, and professional guidance, participants can experience overwhelm or retraumatization. This is why co-facilitation at Arkana, shamans working alongside trained therapist, is so powerful. The medicine opens the door, but integration allows people to carry what they learn into daily life. Without guidance, insights risk being fleeting or misunderstood. With support, they become lasting transformations.
The Broader Impact
Beyond individual healing, studies suggest ayahuasca fosters prosocial behavior and connectedness. Participants often report increased empathy, greater self-compassion, and a renewed sense of purpose. This aligns with what we’ve observed at retreats: people leave not just healed, but ready to show up differently in their relationships, communities, and lives. Science is catching up to what the Shipibo, shamans, and participants have long known: ayahuasca is a powerful catalyst for transformation, if approached with respect, intention, and integrity.
Ayahuasca is not a cure-all, but when combined with ethical guidance, trauma-informed facilitation, and post-retreat integration, it becomes a tool for profound, lasting change. One of the most important lessons I have learned is that every experience with ayahuasca is deeply personal. No matter what you read, what you hear, or what I write here, your journey will be unique. Each person carries their own layers, histories, and intentions, and the medicine meets each of us where we are.
Co-Facilitating and Supporting Others
Since beginning to co-facilitate, my mother and I have focused on creating spaces where participants feel safe, supported, and empowered to explore the medicine responsibly. Seeing lives transform, clients, family, and participants, reminds me that this work is not about ego, recognition, or control. It is about service, stewardship, and creating containers for healing. Mother Ayahuasca continues to guide us in humility, patience, and integrity. Each retreat, each participant, and each ceremony reminds us that the medicine works differently for everyone, and that the true gift lies in allowing each journey to unfold authentically, without expectation or comparison.
Chapter Eight: Do You Hear the Call of Mother Ayahuasca?
There is a quiet, subtle tug at the edge of your awareness. It might come in a dream, a synchronicity, a deep sense of longing, or even in moments of despair. It whispers in the pauses of life, in the space between your thoughts, and sometimes in the ache of your own heart. This is the call of Mother Ayahuasca. Not everyone hears it, and not everyone is ready. But for those who do, it is unmistakable. It is not a casual curiosity, it is an invitation. A call to look inward, to confront what you may have hidden from yourself, to shed old patterns, and to reconnect with your own wholeness.
Who Needs This Journey
Mother Ayahuasca does not discriminate. She does not ask for titles, credentials, or accomplishments. She asks only for openness and sincerity. The medicine meets people where they are, and she can hold the weight of any story:
Those carrying trauma, unresolved grief, or emotional pain that has lingered for years.
Those who have tried therapy, meditation, breathwork, or self-help methods and still feel stuck.
Those who have sacrificed their own needs for others, exhausted by caregiving, codependency, or the relentless desire to fix people or situations.
Those seeking clarity after loss, heartbreak, or life-altering transitions.
Those searching for a deeper connection to themselves, their purpose, and the universe.
This is not just a medicine for “spiritual seekers” or “adventurers.” It is for anyone who feels incomplete, out of alignment, or burdened by the weight of old patterns. If you have felt at the edge, staring into the unknown, and wondered if there could be a way to release and reclaim your life, this call is for you.
Common Intentions, Personal to You
Intentions are not rules; they are guideposts. They give the medicine something to work with, while allowing space for the unexpected. Here are examples of intentions that participants often bring:
“I want to release the pain I’ve carried from past relationships.”
“I am ready to face my fears and reclaim my sense of self.”
“I want to connect to my purpose and find clarity in my life.”
“I want to forgive, not to excuse, but to free myself from carrying resentment.”
“I am ready to step fully into love, for myself and others.”
“I want to understand the patterns that keep repeating in my life.”
These intentions are personal. They are a starting point, not a promise of a predictable experience. Mother Ayahuasca will always give what you need, even if it is not what you expected. She sees beyond surface desires to the deeper layers that require attention, healing, and integration.
When You’ve Tried Everything
Sometimes, people come to ayahuasca after years of searching, therapy, workshops, meditation, breathwork, supplements, and spiritual practices. And yet, there is still a restlessness, a sense that something is missing. If this resonates, it is not failure, it is an invitation. Mother Ayahuasca does not ask you to abandon what you’ve done. Rather, she meets all that you have tried with compassion, weaving your experiences together, opening doors where other paths may have reached dead ends.
A Call to Reflection
Take a moment now. Breathe deeply. Ask yourself:
What patterns have I been carrying that no longer serve me?
What grief, guilt, or fear have I been holding that is not mine to bear?
Where in my life am I pretending to be whole, when deep down I feel fragmented?
Am I ready to meet myself honestly, without judgment, and allow transformation to occur?
This is not a decision to make lightly. Ayahuasca asks for courage, humility, and openness. But it also promises something rare: the chance to reclaim yourself, to step into a life with clarity, purpose, and alignment.
Your Journey Is Unique
No matter what you read, what stories you hear, or what you see in this book, your journey will be different. Each person’s connection to the medicine is unique. Some feel visions, others feel emotional release, some feel physical purging, and many feel all of it at once. Each layer shed, each insight received, and each breakthrough is personal, sacred, and incomparable.
Mother Ayahuasca does not work on a schedule. She meets you where you are ready, in ways that cannot be predicted or controlled. She asks for trust, patience, and surrender, and in return, she offers a depth of healing, clarity, and understanding that is profound and enduring.
Answer the Call
If you feel even a whisper of this call, listen. Do not dismiss it. Explore it with intention, respect, and guidance. Seek spaces where the medicine is honored, the shamans are authentic, and support is available for before, during, and after your experience. The path is not easy, and it is not meant to be. But for those who answer, the rewards are immeasurable: clarity where there was confusion, release where there was pain, love where there was fear, and trust where there was doubt.
Mother Ayahuasca’s call is not a promise of a simple journey, it is an invitation to reclaim your life, layer by layer, in the safety of a sacred container, with guidance, support, and integrity. If you hear her, if your heart stirs even slightly, take the first step. The medicine will meet you there.
Chapter Nine: The Reclaim Your Light Retreats
Answering the call of Mother Ayahuasca is only the beginning. While the medicine itself is profound, the context in which you experience it can make all the difference. This is why our Reclaim Your Light retreats are designed to provide not only the sacred medicine but also the structure, guidance, and support necessary to navigate the depths safely and fully.
A Container of Support
When you attend a Reclaim Your Light retreat, you are not alone. From the moment you express interest, through travel, your time at the retreat, and integration afterward, our team is with you. We understand that facing your inner landscape can be intense, and we provide the tools, guidance, and community support to walk this journey safely.
Here’s what is included:
Workbooks and Pre-Retreat Integration: Before you even arrive, you receive a comprehensive workbook designed to prepare your mind, body, and spirit. Exercises help you reflect on intentions, set boundaries, and understand your relationship with yourself and the medicine.
Therapist-Led Guidance: I, along with my team, provide integration both before and after the retreat. This allows participants to process experiences, gain insights, and translate medicine experiences into real-life growth.
Step-by-Step Support 24/7: While at the retreat, participants have access to guidance around the clock. Whether it’s navigating the intensity of a ceremony, processing a breakthrough, or simply needing reassurance, we are present to hold space.
Safety in Group Travel: Traveling to Peru, the Sacred Valley, or the Amazon jungle can feel overwhelming. All logistics—from flights, transportation, travel tips, and local guidance—are handled for you. My job is to make this journey as comfortable, stress-free, and guided as possible, so you can focus entirely on your healing.
A Community of Like-Minded Souls
One of the most transformative aspects of these retreats is the bond formed with others walking a similar path. Participants enter as strangers and leave as a part of a community that understands the challenges, breakthroughs, and shifts that come with this work. This collective energy amplifies healing, provides accountability, and nurtures long-term connection and friendship.
Main Attributes of the Retreats
Ethical, Authentic Medicine: All ceremonies are conducted with shamans who honor the lineage and sacred tradition of the Shipibo people. Mother Ayahuasca is treated with reverence, and every aspect of the retreat, from food sourcing to ceremony preparation, supports integrity and safety.
Integration and Reflection: Our retreats are more than a single ceremony, they are a journey. Daily integration sessions, breathwork, sound healing, and group sharing ensure participants understand and embody what the medicine is teaching.
Multi-Layered Experiences: Each retreat combines ayahuasca with complementary plant medicine, sacred rituals, excursions, and mindfulness practices, providing opportunities for both inner work and connection to the natural world.
Guided, Personalized Support: Whether it’s helping a participant navigate difficult emotions, facilitating insights, or simply holding space, our team is committed to personalized care throughout the retreat.
Which Retreat is Right for You?
We now offer three unique retreat experiences for 2026, each designed to answer a different call:
July 12-18th 2026: Seven-Day Jungle Retreat: For those ready to surrender fully, immerse in the Amazonian rainforest, and experience the intensity of the medicine alongside ancestral shamans, including Maestra Justina.
July 19th- 29th: Eleven-Day Combined Retreat: Offers the full experience of both Sacred Valley and Jungle locations. Ideal for those who want a deep dive into their journey, experiencing varied landscapes and ceremony settings.
August 2nd-8th: Seven-Day Sacred Valley Retreat: Ideal for those seeking intimate, transformational work in a serene, mountainous environment. Perfect for first-time participants or those wanting deep personal reflection.
No matter which path you choose, the retreat is designed to meet you where you are. The work is never rushed; it is guided, supported, and held with integrity. Each participant’s experience is unique, your breakthroughs, insights, and reflections are your own, but the structure, community, and guidance ensure you never have to walk the path alone.
Chapter Ten: How to Know If You Are Ready & Next Steps If You Feel the Call
The call of Mother Ayahuasca is quiet but insistent. It may appear as a subtle nudge in your dreams, a deep curiosity that won’t leave you alone, or a sense that your next chapter is calling. But how do you know if you’re ready to answer, and how do you take that next step safely and intentionally?
Signs You Might Be Ready
While every person’s journey is unique, here are some reflections to help you discern if this is your time:
A Deep Sense of Longing or Restlessness: Perhaps you’ve tried everything—therapy, breathwork, meditation, self-help—but something still feels unresolved. This quiet yearning often signals that a deeper journey is calling.
Willingness to Look Within: Ayahuasca does not give what you want—it gives what you need. Being ready means being open to meet your own patterns, fears, grief, and shadows with courage and curiosity.
Desire for Transformation, Not Just Experience: If you’re seeking a “trip” or adventure alone, the medicine may not serve you in the way you hope. True readiness comes from a desire for profound personal growth, healing, and release.
Openness to Guidance: Being ready includes knowing that you don’t have to navigate this alone. Guided, ethical support ensures your journey is safe and transformative.
Willingness to Surrender: Mother Ayahuasca asks you to trust the process. She shows you what you need to see when you’re ready to receive it.
Next Steps if You Feel the Call
If your heart resonates with this calling, there’s a clear path to honor it safely:
Reach Out to Us for a Discovery Call: Booking a short call allows us to discuss your intentions, personal history, and needs. Together, we can determine which retreat is the best fit for you, Sacred Valley, Jungle, or the combined 11-day experience.
Explore Your Excursions and Experiences: Each retreat includes meaningful excursions and immersive experiences designed to support your healing journey:
Sacred Valley adventures through ancient villages
Sloth and wildlife sightings in the jungle
Private guided tours to Machu Picchu
Shipibo markets and cultural experiences
Boat tours under the stars along the Pisqui River
These excursions are designed to deepen your connection to the land, culture, and yourself.
Flexible Payment Plans: We understand that transformational retreats are a big investment, which is why flexible payment options are available. We are committed to helping you achieve this bucket-list dream without undue stress.
Prepare Mindfully: Before you arrive, we provide workbooks, guidance on diet and intention-setting, and pre-retreat support to ensure your journey is intentional, safe, and transformative.
Commit to Integration: Healing continues long after the final ceremony. Our retreats include structured integration with therapist-led guidance, group circles, and tools to translate insights into lasting life change.
A Gentle Reminder
Your readiness is felt in your heart. There is no rush, no pressure, no perfect timeline. The call is yours to honor on your own terms, but when you do, it can be profoundly transformative.
With Love,
Dr. Rachel Sims
